Fall’s end, my favorite time of year for as long as I can remember, not exactly sure why it feels so good but I do love November. Perhaps it’s the weather changing from our hot and sticky Indian summer to cooler shorter days and longer crisp nights. A welcomed relief, I’d much rather see my breath than feel the sting of sweat in my eyes. Could it be the excitement of “that” time of year when people go home for the holidays? Our whole family lives within minutes of each other so that can’t be it. Maybe because Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday!  What a joy when we were doubly blessed that Thanksgiving in 1970, when I gave birth to my first child, a son. Yes, November is always eventful. Not only do we celebrate a number of birthdays and more than a few wedding anniversaries… It also marks the beginning of the holiday season. November’s always been a busy time of year for our family.

This year was the busiest.

November 2006, has been both traditionally sweet as well as sadly poignant.  It’s amazing how ones heart can hold all the joys and pains of life without bursting wide open. I’ve been keenly aware of the fullness in my chest these many weeks since my brother’s passing… the ache creeps up into my throat as I swallow hard over and over to keep the tears from silently sliding down my cheeks. Tears of grief to be sure but happiness too… truly my cup runneth over.

The month started off with a bang.  I hosted Bunko for a group of friends who have been playing together once a month since our daughters were in kindergarten some twenty years ago. The following weekend was filled with memorials for Tom. Several family members and long time friends of my brother played a round of golf in his honor then spent the evening reminiscing about “All things Tom” while creating a floral lei in preparation for a paddle out the next day in Huntington Beach. Sunday we gathered for Tom’s memorial. My cousin prepared, with Tom’s help, a beautiful service with tributes to our parents, who had been Tom’s caregivers for the last several years. As instructed by my brother she read aloud from a letter he had written filled with heartfelt thanks to family, friends, and hospice workers whom he loved and who will always love him. My oldest brother shared a DVD he made from old family films and snap shots he assembled with great care gently piecing in just the right music here and there.  We spent many hours in fellowship laughing and crying that day as we shared memory after memory… some old, some new… all too precious to let go unsaid. I had a hard time leaving that night… my husband didn’t say anything as he sat with me until I was ready to go. We were the last ones to leave. It was a good day.  Two and half weeks later he and I and my folks went to a special spot where Tom wanted his ashes scattered and we honored his wishes again on what would have been his 55th birthday. A healing experience in so many ways for all four of us. Yes, a huge month but it wasn’t over yet.

Thanksgiving was coming and we had so much to be thankful for. Tucked in-between Tom’s memorial and Thanksgiving we were able to help our oldest son, his wife and our two grandchildren move into their new home. The whole famdamnily was there to lend a hand. Not hard considering they moved about a mile from their condo and are now living within walking distance of our second son and his wife and our eldest daughter and her new husband. They’ve actually succeeded in narrowing the triangle between the three residences. The eight of them could only live closer if they started a commune.

Finally Thanksgiving Day arrived. An extra special Thanksgiving this year because my parents’ anniversary fell on Thursday, November 23rd for the first time in as long as I could remember so we were going to celebrate their 60th wedding anniversary as a tribute to their union. Sixty years!! Truly a milestone to be commemorated with all the joy and elation due the deserving couple. They didn’t have a wedding in 1946, or a reception, or even a cake. They didn’t send out announcements or get gifts or go on a honeymoon. They didn’t get to delight in any of the things you do when committing to a lifetime together. So we made up for all of that these many many years later and had a lovely reception with all the trimmings for two wonderful people who have worked so hard at their marriage because they love their family so much. Thanks Mom and Dad, without you there would be no “us”. You’ve both been an inspiration to anyone who has had the privilege of knowing you.

Ah, sweet November… It’s amazing how ones heart can hold all the joys and pains of life without bursting wide open.